Welcome to the season of life where your coffee is cold, your toddler is loud, and your plans are mostly theoretical. Deployments, Tantrums, & Cold Coffee is my ongoing reminder (to you and myself) that military parenting isn’t about perfect—it’s about showing up, staying sane, and sometimes just surviving until bedtime. This blog isn’t here to give you a checklist for better balance or guilt you into a new morning routine. It’s here to say: if all you did today was keep everyone breathing and maybe wipe down a highchair, you’re doing just fine.

This is not the season of life for Pinterest-level parenting or perfectly balanced meals. Some nights, dinner will be cereal and a side of exhaustion. That’s okay. You kept small humans alive. You showed up to work (or didn’t because you were too fried—that’s okay too). You answered the 137th “why” question with something vaguely science-adjacent. That’s enough. You don’t have to thrive; survival with semi-clean socks counts.

Here’s a personal confession: as a type-A scrunchy mom, when I was pregnant, I swore up and down that my child would never have screen time before the age of two…LOL. Fast forward to real life—I’m working full time, my toddler is home with me all day, and my husband works Drill Sergeant hours. We still consider ourselves a very low screen time household. However, sometimes, the TV is the only thing standing between me and a complete mental breakdown after my husband’s been gone for 3 days. Even just 10 minutes of quiet while Bluey teaches my kid emotional intelligence (and teaches me emotional regulation) can completely reset my whole mindset for the day—especially when teething is pushing everyone in the house to the edge. One day I put on a nature documentary for 30 minutes so I could work and felt better knowing at least it was educational. While we all want to ace parenting, it is 100% okay to sometimes do the bare minimum and forgive yourself for lowering your own self-set expectations. Your child doesn’t need perfection. They need a happy, healthy parent.

So, here’s your permission slip to let go of the pressure. Sometimes, it’s okay to break your own parenting rules in the name of survival—especially when you’re solo-parenting through training schedules, late nights, or the world’s longest deployment. A little screen time doesn’t make you a bad parent. Cold cereal dinners don’t mean you’ve failed. You’re raising tiny humans in less-than-tiny circumstances. Give yourself the same grace you give your kids. Remember: semi-clean socks and a little Bluey wisdom might just be the glue holding it all together—and that totally counts. For more ways to find light in the hard days, check out the next article in the series, Creating Micro-Moments of Joy.

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